WHAT IS SUCCESS?

Success can be measured in many ways. Some measure it by their highly important jobs, how many expensive possessions they own, or how much money they make. Others think you're successful if you have won a lot of awards or achieved the highest promotion. I define success in a different way: success is when you stand up to an illness, when you achieve goals you set for yourself, when you can hold a job even when others think you can't, and when you make small steps towards recovery.

While struggling with mental illness, I found even the smallest steps I took could be considered acts of success. Forcing myself to get out of bed and go to work when I was falling apart inside was an accomplishment. Taking a friend's challenge to go a year without injuring was success. Admitting I had an illness and finding help was an accomplishment. Each small step I took towards getting well I relished and celebrated because those were the hardest steps in my life I had to take.

Recently I celebrated twenty years at my job. It's not a prestigious job, but it is a good job. I've worked through deep depression and cried in the bathroom. I faced customers with a smile, when I was contemplating my death. A therapist and friends told me I should go on disability, but I refused. I wanted to work even when I felt as if I couldn't make it through another day.

Now I struggle with anxiety attacks and aches and pains from working the same job for many years, but I continue on. Each and every day I reach out and touch people just by listening and talking to them. I find this to be very rewarding. The hug I get from my ninety-year-old customer puts a smile on his face and warms my heart. An elderly lady that comes in gives me a hug and tells me stories about her departed daughter, gives her comfort, and makes me feel good. These are the reasons I continued for twenty years to face my illness and go to work. This is what I consider part of my success story.

Each step I have taken and I continue to take within my process to reach and stay within recovery is a story of success. You, too, can create your own success story by choosing to reach for recovery and celebrating each step you take towards climbing to the top of the hole. Everyone is successful in his or her own way. Each person has had a struggle to face, and it is how you choose to stand up to it that makes you successful. Who cares how many worldly processions or how much money you have? That doesn't count in the end. It's how hard you work, how you face your struggles, and how determined you are that creates your success.

I cherish each new step I make, and I celebrate all my successes-even the small ones-and this helps me stand tall within the light.